by
Rudy Rucker, Earthlight 1999
Rudy is my favorite pervy math-nerd sci-fi writer (see review #44). I probably would not have bought this book if it had been more than the £3 I paid, since I have overdosed on his aged hippiness. And Saucer Wisdom is pretty much a retread of his other work (particularly
Freeware), with some personal stuff you didn't want to know, like his jealousy of
William Gibson
, and his (possibly fictional) alcoholism. And less plot. But he is at his best on the kinky genetic engineering:
"Our first product will be called Big Tongue," says one of the techies [...] "It is bioengineered from a cow's tongue crossed with the nervous system of a flatworm and the digestive tract of a shrew." Saleem smiles, takes a drink of ice water. "Such a collage creature is called a chimera, after the Greek myth of a beast that was the combination of a lion, goat and a serpent."
"D'oh!" says one of the venture capitalists, a fat yellowish man. "How in the world are you going to market this, Saleem?"
"I'm glad you ask, " says Saleem, "Big Tongue has four selling points, which we are summarising as Big Tongue licks clean, Big Tongue cares, Big Tongue keeps mum, and Big Tongue licks you." [...] [ Big Tongue is organic, not a machine ] "Big Tongue is our kin, Big Tongue is based on DNA, Big Tongue cares. It participates, if you will, in the Gaian morphic resonance."
[ different scene ]
"You want to shoot this?"
"Of course, that's why I asked you over, duh. I'm going to make a little news feature comparing the Big Tongue and the Lickin' Luv Slug -- for the Suzanna Quarkaese Me-Show. For my hundreds of fans. Once I had four-hundred-and-sixty-three-viewers!"
"Oooo-kay, " says Benny. He puts a piezoplastic uvvy patch the size of a silver dollar on the back of his neck and a little plastic dragonfly ops up off its perch on a kitchen shelf and begins flying around.
There is a drawing of Suzanna in the shower testing the two devices/creatures.
And he uses the word floccilation (fitful plucking at the bedclothes).
So it has its points.